To and Fro

I've been trying to get a feel for this day. It was difficult. A general sense of detachment was prevalent. Almost a bit like last year. The rest or the world, so it seemed to me, was busy doing their thing and I just could not engage. I just felt like it was some sort of different reality I'm in.

In the birthing process, there is this rhythm. There's the push and then a brief period where everything reverts seemingly backward. It's like the waves pulling out to sea, preparing for the next big one to hit the beach. I do believe what I've experienced today goes under that category of "pulling backwards". The experience of the old paradigm is so very far away and the experience of the new paradigm seems so disconnected, when just a few days ago, it felt like there was a broad bridge connecting the two. These are all just my very subjective experiences of today's energetic make up. I am not checking on any websites for "evidence" on purpose, for I have set out to just experience what I experience and write about it.

Through the pull-back phase, there's always a sense of unease for me. It was that way, when I gave birth to my own children. I did not particularly care for that phase, but I do sense it's validity in the bigger scheme of things. As with any natural birthing process, there's nothing that needs to be done other than to be alert, aware and relaxed in the to and fro of these energetic waves. Holding on to any state would just cost way too much energy and be counter productive, so I'll release any worries, surprises or feelings of attachment to how it should be, focus on my heart to stay in the now moment, yet again, being a buoy carried to and fro by the waves of New Earth's birth energies, yet centered within myself.