Sometimes, a person will adjust their reality to make it cushier, to make it easier to bear. It so happens, that our minds are rather clever. They may suggest and make us believe things that aren't exactly true. I have done this numerous times and I see other people in my environment do this very thing. I think that this form of self-deception does not happen with the intent to harm anyone, rather it seems to be a mechanism of self-protection. Sometimes, the truth of our actions, deeds and intentions is too painful to embrace. Sometimes we want to believe ourselves to be better than how we have obviously behaved, thought or done. It is a natural mechanism that has pretty far reaching consequences however.
The truth has a signature that runs through every situation. It is an energy flow that can be perceived. When I recognize it for myself in a situation where I have created a deception for myself and projected that outward, I feel very compelled to just eat the humble pie and fess up to "duh! I've done this wrong, I can do better and I will endeavor when I get my very next chance." Such is the stumble, fall, get up and try again method of this Earthly experience - at least for me.
I have had the beautiful lesson to look at what happens when a deception, a delusion is perpetuated. The one who is trying to hide a misstep is creating this new reality that not in alignment with the truth of what actually happened. The person who has created that reality is trying to reinforce it by telling it over and over again. He or she is thus seeking the approval of those around him or her, in order to make the delusion real. I've pondered over what would happen, if this approval was not forthcoming any longer. If the person would still find approval elsewhere, he or she would undoubtedly slip away from my reality and keep on experiencing his own creation, continually reinforced by those who reinforce it. The imprint of that deception will be eventually accepted as "real" and anyone who challenges that will run against a brick wall.
There is a different possible outcome and that is, if that person is seeking approval from me, and I do not give it and keep that person in my heart with open acceptance that everyone is allowed their very own reality, be it truthful or not, instead of slipping away, there may be that one moment where a question comes my way. This is more likely to be a question of seeking approval in the form of: "I'm right, no ?", which creates the opening for me to speak up and share what I see to be the more truthful situation. I have to wait for this situation however, I have no right really, to dabble in another's reality - unless... yes, there is an exception. Unless the delusion, the perpetuated lie that has been accepted as a reality by the other, has a direct negative impact on my child. As a mother, I feel that I have not only the right, to bring truth to this issue if it affects my kid, but it is my irrevocable duty to stand up for my kid and help heal the situation, for by remaining silent, I would give silent approval for a lie to be accepted as real, with all the consequences involved. That to me would be like being the liar myself.
No comments:
Post a Comment