Saturday, January 22, 2011

Asking for Help

This morning I awoke with a memory. It was etched in my mind clearly. I hadn't thought of this memory in a very long time. It is however pivotal that I speak of this now.

It was 1989 and I had experienced about 10 years worth of back troubles with scoliosis, due to bad posture and a growth spurt that was quite extreme at age 15. I had the x-rays to show my curved spine and other than surgery, there was no recourse. I had backed away from surgery intuitively and just kept on going about my business until that one morning, when I woke up and tried to swing my legs out of bed. Well, I recall that the feet hit the floor and as I was trying to get up a severe jolt of pain raced up my spine and I felt that I could not move anymore. Not in the paralyzed sense, but in the sense of wanting to avoid any further pain. I gingerly did try to move and scooted around the bed a bit. Every little movement hurt so badly that tears just streamed down my face. I felt utterly forlorn in that moment. Nothing made sense. Why was I in this condition? Sure, I did feel utterly sorry for myself. Then I heard a voice, very quiet, but very clear. It asked me: "Why don't you ask for help ?" I was stunned. I had sat there on my bed for at least an hour trying to figure out how to get up to even call in sick, but asking the Universe for help had not been on my list of possible actions. I figured that OK, I have nothing to lose, so I asked for help. I even added a "please". What happened next can only be described as "a miracle". I felt a tingling come from my crown and it flowed down my spine. At the area where my back had been "out", it felt like in front and back there were two energetic hands. Within minutes they simply straightened out my spine and unkinked where the vertebrae had pinched the nerve. I distinctly felt bone move gently into a more natural place. The whole thing lasted perhaps 5 or 10 minutes. During this magic moment, my tears were flowing freely and this time, it was a mix of shame, being humbled and gratitude. (quite a funny emotion thus mixed up actually.) Then, that quiet voice said: "Stand up!" and I did - pain free.

I can't remember whether I actually did go to work that day or not. What I do remember is going to my doctor and having new x-rays done about a month after this incident and the x-rays showed that the spine was completely healed. No more curvature.  I was truly healed.

The reason why the Universe isn't offering direct help until you ask for it is what I call the "prime directive" here on Earth: Free Will Choice. As long as you are not asking explicitly for help, there's nothing anyone can do, for it is respected that you have free will choice and if suffering is your choice, so be it.

We can never truly know the magnitude or sort of gifts the Universe has in store for us, but we can try to find out, by asking for help when our worries become overwhelming, when we feel unable to do another step alone; when our health fails us or our hearts won't open to the unconditional love that is required for attaining the next increase in frequency. I absolutely believe that every single person will receive the unique gift the Universe has in place, for that specific moment when they open up to the possibility of simply asking for help and be ready to accept the gift.

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