Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Trust that Inner Voice

The inner voices that have guided me for as long as I can think have stirred more than one controversy in my lifetime. I have however, stubborn as I am, held on to them and trusted the messages most of the time. Wait a minute, am I admitting to hearing voices here ? Oops...I guess, yes, I am. Well, I've been born clair-audient and as such have heard voices all my life. It isn't anything to be afraid of, however, it did take me a while to divvy out which voices were truly mine (just kidding).

I have great fondness for my voices (can I call it my inner voice, for different situations brought about different sounding voices, but I believe it was just one all along - my higher self). That one time, when I was on my little motorcycle, when I was 15 years old... I was on the back roads, riding my moped over to go to my internship. It was Summer, my blouse was speckled with little mosquitoes that had splatted against me while riding at a whooping 15 mph (no helmets, wind in my hair, it was Summer in the 70s after all). Right before a small tunnel, this voice of mine demanded with a voice that did not allow for any argument to "pull over now"! and take my time to pick off these little specks off my white blouse. So I did - the moment I had probably picked of 4 - 5 of them, a big truck came speeding through the one lane tunnel at about 60 mph. It raced by me while I sat on my moped, stunned, shaking with wet cheeks, for my tears had come unbidden. That silly voice, that very stern voice - it had literally saved my life.

It is but one little story, but possibly the one that convinced me once and for all, that it is really a good thing to listen to the inner voice. Having my life saved by following it's advice was no small thing to me - From then on, I listened, I didn't always listen to my parents' advice, nor that of my appointed teachers, nor the chosen teachers. I always listened to my inner voice.

That inner voice has since guided me on my journey and has allowed me to make my way through a labyrinth of choices and opportunities. I can't say, I was always happy with what the voice said, but I had developed a feeling of utter trust and knowing that I would certainly know when my options had run out and I better follow the advice of my guiding voice.

So, I had the luck to have been born clair-audient and to even hear voices. Instead of "going insane", I've made sense of it all and have gained an invaluable navigation system. I can only wonder how it is for other folks, who hear "nothing". I can, and know however, that whenever I hear my inner voice, there is a certain feeling in the area of my stomach - yes, that gut instinct type of feeling. It has been an indivisible part of my guiding voice and I bet, there are people who have that gut feeling and hear no voice - at least they feel a "yes" or a "no" when they find themselves at a crossroads in life.

I guess what I am trying to say today, is that it is a good idea to pay attention to our intuition, our inner voice, our inner feeling for a situation, before running headlong into it. There are many stories out there, freely available on the internet. Some speak of things that resonate with us, some are just hard to grasp. It can become so utterly confusing as to what is real, what is not, what works, what doesn't - and by no means am I trying to discredit anyone's writings, for all I know, it's their point of view and entirely valid (for them), as my point of view is ultimately only valid for myself. When I offer my point of view, my experience and my epiphanies, I always expect the readers to use their own faculties, their own guiding instruments, their inner voice, their gut instinct, to decide what would/could possibly work for them and what is best discarded with a click on the X in the upper right hand corner of the screen.

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